After successfully getting a new handbag you headed off to the hair salon.
“Yo fine husband asked me.” He said as he pointed to himself then flicked his hands like it was the biggest compliment ever to be asked to do something by Hawks, “to look after you today, so we gone give you a bit of a make over to keep those big scary officials away from you. So I’m taking you to Jasmine.”
“Who is jasmine?”
Brian led you to the hair salon and opened the door, greeting Jasmine who looked up as you entered.
She was the most beautiful girl you had ever laid eyes on and you stared wide eyed at her.
“Oh my god she’s gorgeous!?”
Brian flitted his way in and Jasmine beamed at him as he approached her.
“How’s my smootchy-poo~.” He sung as he kissed her on the cheek then complimented her eyebrows, he then turned to you.
“Honey, this is Jasmine, the best hairdresser in town.” He said emphatically while flicking his hand for emphasis.
“Jasmine, this is the wife of Hawks.” He said proudly, “isn’t she gorgeous.” He complimented you.
You blushed and looked down bashfully.
“Oh my god, really?!” A booming male voice said and you jumped, looking up to see who had spoken as it was only you, Brian and Jasmine in the salon.
“I know right! Soooo jealous.” Brian said to Jasmine.
“Wait hold up….”
“Pleasure to meet you!” Jasmine said in the deepest most masculine voice you had ever heard.
“Now babes we need you to channel your best Joh Bailey and work your miracles to transform this babe into mega babe!” Brian said flamboyantly.
“It would be my pleasure.” Jasmine said deeply.
You sheepishly followed Brian’s lead as he led you to a chair and sat you down, plopping down in the empty chair beside you ready to catch up on the gossip.
“Before I get to draggin’ bitches, let’s have a widdle chat about what look you’re after.” Brian said to you as he clapped his hands excitedly.
“Can I suggest [hair cut you’ve always wanted] and [colour you’ve always liked]?” Jasmine offered in her baritone voice.
“Oh!” You gasped softly, “yes please, I-I really like that cut and colour.”
“I am telling you baby cakes, jazzy-poo is Ah-mayZING!” Brain said with finger clicks.
“Thanks Pooh bear.” Jasmine replied deeply as she walked off to get her scissors and other items necessary for the makeover.
“So!” Brian said, once Jasmine had come back with her stylus tools. “Let’s catch up!” He said excitedly as he flicked a leg up and over his other leg. “I hear Miranda from the flower shop has been creepin’.” He said as he took another sip of his coffee.
“Mmhmm.” Jasmine replied deeply, “her and Mr Fudgepacker.”
You choked on your spit and coughed profusely.
“Oh honey do you need some water?” Brian asked as he touched your shoulder gently and worried nervously.
“MR FUDGEPACKER?! OH MY GOD DID HAWKS KNOW HE EXISTED?!”
Brian raced off to get you some water and you thanked him when he returned and took the glass, sipping gently as he and Jasmine continued their conversation.
You listened in quietly.
It sounded like Miranda and Mr Fudgepacker were having an affair.
“She’s always crying about how her husband isn’t faithful but that’s none of my business.” Brian said as he took another sip of his coffee while looking away with raised eyebrows.
You stifled a giggle.
“She nasty.” He added after he had swallowed his mouthful of coffee.
Just then Miranda entered the shop and Brian groaned.
“Oh my godddd, drama!” You squealed internally.
“Hi Miranda.” Jasmine said stiffly.
“Hi.” She replied curtly, “your sign out the front,” she said pointing to a small a-frame out the front of Jasmine’s shop. “Is glaring in my shop window, the sun is reflecting off of it and it’s hurting my eyes.” She said in a sassy voice.
“Close your eyes then sweety.” Brian said in his most passive aggressive effeminate voice as he leaned back in his chair to stare Miranda down.
Miranda glared at him and he smiled sweetly while batting his eyelashes.
“Thank you Miranda, ill move it in a sec.” jasmine said in her deep voice.
The flower shop prude didn’t say anything but just spun on her heels and sauntered out of the shop with her nose in the air.
“Bitch.” Brian uttered under his breath, “got nothing better to do than cheat and complain about petty shit, that’s why no one shops at her shop.”
You snorted and slapped a hand to your mouth.
Then Brian realized that he had just said all of that out loud.
“Oh my god!” He said loudly as he slapped his hands to his cheeks, “I am such a horrible person, wait, I need to cleanse of this bad energy!”
He jumped up and grabbed a bottle of spray from Jasmines counter then turned and sprayed it liberally into the air while chanting something.
As you listened closely is was the lyrics to lady Gaga’s ‘born that way’ song.
Jasmine cracked a smile as she continued to work her magic on you.
“We just need to set your colour now babe.” Jasmine said as she put a cover on your hair and set the timer. “Won’t be long now, would you like some music on? It’s just us in here so you can choose whatever you like.”
“Really?!” You asked softly with sparkling eyes.
“Sure.” Jasmine said with a brilliant smile.
“C-can I have [song of choice]?” You asked in a hushed voice.
Jasmine nodded and walked over to her laptop and typed something in.
Next minute your song started and Brian screamed.
“I LOVE THIS SONG!!!” He squealed as he pranced around with coffee still in hand.
You watched with delight as Brian did the most contemporary dance you had ever seen complete with high kick and splits.
He was in his element.
As the song came to a finish you clapped enthusiastically.
“Oh god I’m so unfit.” He puffed as he flopped down in the chair beside you. “Haven’t danced like that since I met Anthony!”
“How did you meet uncle Anthony?” You asked him curiously.
“I saved him like a queen in shining armour.” Brian wheezed, still trying to catch his breath from his enthusiastic dance.
“Saved him?” You enquired.
“He was being hit on by some ratchet bitch in the local club and I sashayed my way in and held up my rainbow flag while hissing.” Brian said nonchalantly.
“Did you know he was gay?” You asked curiously.
“Honey my gaydar is packing more heat than your manz, I could see him from across the room and it was love at first sight.” Brian said dreamily.
You blushed, Brian’s comment reminding you of last night with Hawks.
“Did you start dating right away?” You asked curiously.
Brian gave you the most devilish smile and chuckled deviously.
“Oh honey, it wasn’t that innocent let me tell you!” He leered, “I took him back to my place, topped him, then he just kept callin’ me until I finally said yes to dating him.” Brian said in the most smug voice you had ever heard.
“So he is the top in this relationship then?!” You thought with surprise.
Just then the timer went off and jasmine came back to continue working on your makeover.
Another hour later and jasmine had finished.
You stared at the new you in the mirror, shocked at how good you looked.
“SIRENSSSSS! LAWD THEY COMING FOR YOU!!!” Brian screamed excitedly, “guuuurrlll take to the catwalk because you look Ah-mayZING!!”
You giggled and stood up out of the chair.
“Thank you so much Jasmine.” You said with tears of gratitude in your eyes as you turned to her.
She opened her arms and engulfed you in a happy hug.
“You’re welcome honey.” She said in her deep voice.
Brian was still fangirling away in the background and you smiled over at him as he fanned himself rapidly.