Really Fake Chapter 28: Y’all Ain’t Ready

You got up from your seat and stepped up beside pa, taking his arm in yours.

“Ms Marple, if we are interfering with your dinner date then feel free to head home alone and we’ll do dinner with pa tonight and you can have him another night.” You said with a serene smile on your face- one of those smiles where you knew the wearer was going to S N A P at any given moment.

She smiled hollowly back at you- bitch mode activated, and bat her eyelashes daintily.

“Oh, honey, no need to be like that. I just love your grandpa so much that I want to spend as much time with him as possible.” She said, “is that a crime?” She added on the end, acting overly innocent.

You scowled then looked at pa.

“Pa?” You asked, “what do you think?”

“I think they’re terrific.” He said, staring straight into Ms Marple’s cleavage, “thought so the first minute I laid eyes on ’em.”

“Pa, oh my god.” You muttered, “use your brain not your, uh…”

“My brain sits in my balls.” He warbled with a loud cackle on the end.

“Ok. Thanks. I want to die now.” You deadpanned, “I’m going to get Kuroo.”

“Hold on a minute, love.” Pa said as you let his arm go, “please come tonight? Don’t leave me.”

The way he said it melted your heart and you softened.

“It’s ok, pa, we’ll come. Let me get Kuroo then we’ll go.” You said with a loving smile, ignoring Ms Marple.

You turned and headed away, eager to tell Kuroo about the true Ms Marple as you walked across to the stairs.

“Reminds me of my granddaughter.” You heard Ms Marple comment to your pa. “She can get an attitude but she’s stunning so she can get away with it.”

“What’s her name?” Pa asked as he reached a hand out to squeeze Ms Marple’s boob.

“Liisa… with two i’s.” Ms Marple said, tapping pa’s hand away.

You froze mid step.

The name ‘Liisa’ bringing back all the trauma you had experienced; before the adrenaline kicked in and you bolted down the stairs.

“KUROO!” You screeched as you neared him. “KUROO! It’s her, she’s her grandma. I KNEW something was off—.”

“What?” Kuroo asked in a bewildered voice, his eyes darting all over your face, trying to read the situation.

“—we need to break them up, oh my god, I’m freaking out right now. You need to help me—.”

“Y/N, calm down… what’s—.”

“—Maybe we could push her into oncoming traffic. I need to ring M/F; she knows how to hide a dead body. Or maybe we could send the bitch into outer space with her giant ass titties—.”

“What the fuck?” Kuroo half laughed, mostly still confused, “who is this? What’s going on?”

“Ms Marple is Liisa’s grandma!” You screeched.

Kuroo paused in shock.

“She—.”

“YES! We need to break her and pa up. I think if we bought him boobs and a sex doll he would leave her in a heartbeat. That’s all he seems to be interested in.” You said, slightly out of breath from all the talking you had been doing; and the adrenaline in your system.

“Ok. Leave it with me.” Kuroo said, immediately scheming something as he looked to the side, deep in thought about something.

Just then Bokuto strolled over to talk with Kuroo.

“Hey, Hey, Hey!” He called loudly, “that was a good game.” He continued proudly, grinning widely as he shoved his closed fists onto his hips, “but we’ll beat you next time, we’re going to get even better so you’d better practice hard!”

“Oho ho ho?” Kuroo leered cheekily as he turned to face the Fukurōdani captain, “if we practice even harder the point difference will be wider next time.”

“Don’t think you can’t stop me forever!” Bokuto warned loudly, “I am the ace of this team!”

“We’ll stop you alright, you horned owl bastard!” Kuroo teased, putting his hand out to slap it against Bokuto’s, the pair engaging in a friendly hand slap gesture while you watched on.

“Oh.” Bokuto said suddenly, looking past Kuroo to you. “Your girlfriend, Kuroo-san?

“Yep, this is my short stack.” Kuroo said proudly as he reached out and pulled you into his side before listing his sweaty arm and resting it on your head to exaggerate the height difference.

You immediately stomped on his toe and huffed as you crossed your arms across your chest defiantly as he removed his arm from your head and made a pitiful noise.

“Don’t think he’s the top in this relationship.” You said cheekily as you smirked at Kuroo from the corner of your eye while he half hopped on one foot.

“It’s the short ones you gotta watch, Kuroo-san.” Bokuto teased.

“He would be lost without me.” You added confidently.

“She’s right.” Kuroo leered, “I am lost… that’s why I follow her to her room and—.”

You stomped on his foot again.

“My foot!” He wailed, limping around, “a mouse trod on it.”

Bokuto burst out laughing, his laughter drawing the attention of the three shy girls who had been in attendance of the match.

“Looks like you have company.” Kuroo said lowly to Bokuto, jerking his head in the direction of the giggling girls.

“Bokuto.” Akaashi’s voice called sternly, “we’re going now.”

The dejected look on all three girls faces was enough to make you cry as they watched their idol say goodbye to you and Kuroo then head back to Akaashi.

“I have to finish up with my team.” Kuroo said quickly to you, “just wait here for me and I’ll be back, hopefully I’ll come up with a plan to get pa out of this relationship too.” He added, backing back towards the court door as he winked at you.

You nodded with a shy look on your face, stepping off to the side so you could blend into the background and wait for him to return.

Kuroo was back in no time with his bag, and gave you a smile as he walked up.

“Ok, let’s go.” He said as he took your hand in his, “wait, but first; aren’t you forgetting something?”

You looked up at him curiously.

“No? What have I forgotten?” You asked honestly.

“This.” He said lowly as he bent his head down to you and kissed you on the lips, “we won didn’t we? I should get a winning kiss, at least!”

A flustered look crossed your face and you looked around quickly to make sure no one else had seen.

“Y-Yeah, I guess…” You mumbled with embarrassment, looking away to hide your happy smile. 

<<< Really Fake Chapter 27: Bokuto The Great

Really Fake Chapter 29: Dinner Date >>>