Really Fake Chapter 18: Shittykawa

“Uh, it’s kinda an embarrassing story.” You said with a sheepish chuckle.

Oikawa pouted and popped the back of his hand on one hip as he sassily waited for you to continue. So seeing that he was waiting for you to elaborate, you went ahead and told the story.

“I wanted to make some friends. And the girls closest to me in class both had boyfriends so I pretended I had one too… then that afternoon I went and took a picture of some random guy to prove that I had a ‘man’ but turns out, when I showed them the picture, I had taken a photo of the Nekoma high volleyball captain, Kuroo… Long story short he agreed to play the role of boyfriend to mess with them aaaaand that’s kinda where it’s at.” You said with another hollow laugh on the end.

“So… it’s fake then?” Oikawa asked.

“Uh, yeah…” You replied, “really fake.”

“You’ve never kissed?”

“No?”

“Held hands?”

“No?”

“Had se-.”

“-Why does that always come up?!” You asked loudly with an exasperated look on your face.

“You know you’ve ruined everything?!” Oikawa suddenly said in an almost distraught voice as he threw his hands up in the air to show his displeasure at the whole situation.

“S-Sorry… what?” You asked in confusion.

“You!” He snapped, “this whole day has been ruined!”

“I’m not following, I don’t understand what’s going on?” You said with a sadly confused look on your face. “How does me not dating Kuroo ruin today?”

“Because this was all a set up to get revenge on him!” Oikawa said with annoyance, “how am I supposed to rub it in his face when you’re not even going out?!”

“Wait…what?” You said sadly, “this was a set up?”

Your heart, that had felt so light today, suddenly seized and sank into the pit of your stomach, dread setting in as you realized you had been used.

“Yes indeed it was, and now it’s all for nothing.” He said angrily as he crossed his arms across his chest. “You own me for wasting my whole day. All I’ve done is walk around for no reason at all, buying you gifts for no reason at all!”

The shame set in and you hung your head as tears started to form in the corner of your eyes.

“What do you have to say for yourself?” He asked in an irked tone. “Good thing this is fake because I don’t think I’d have been able to pretend to date you for any longer, you’re—.”

“—ok, I’ve heard enough.” A male voice suddenly said from nearby.

Oikawa stopped and you both looked over to see who had spoken.

Kuroo, in a sunglasses disguise, was sitting on a bench nearby, head rolled to the side as he pulled his glasses down a little to gaze over the top with his cat like irises.

“You.” Oikawa seethed as Kuroo stood up and started walking casually over. “You’re the worst! You set this up didn’t you? Making me waste my time with this pathe-.”

But his sentence was interrupted by Kuroo’s sharp fist in his face, punching him fair and square between the eyes.

The pretty boy captain recoiled and quickly held onto his face, crying out with surprise and pain.

“Kuroo?!” You gasped with shock, reaching out to stop the Nekoma high captain, “what are you doing?”

Kuroo quickly grabbed you by the arm and yanked you into his embrace as he spun you around so your back was placed up against his front, both of you looking at Oikawa as Kuroo placed an arm protective around you and held you against his torso.

“We may not be going out but I won’t let you say anything nasty to her like that.” He said in a threatening tone as Oikawa pulled his hand from his face to glare at the two of you.

“You’re both pathetic, she’s nothing but a useless—,”

Suddenly some other random guy flew up out of nowhere and king hit Oikawa in the side of the head, sending him flying.

“I told you not to break her heart, you piece of shit!” The guy yelled angrily, fists balled up as he stalked over to the crumpled up heap of Oikawa on the ground, towering over him.

“B-But Iwa-Chan!” Oikawa wailed as she shielded his face, looking up at the guy who had hit him, as he lay huddled on the ground.

“There’s no fucking excuse, you low life.” The guy named Iwa-chan growled, “get up, you’re a disgrace.”

“But she ruined everything.” Oikawa whined as he got up and tried to hang onto his teammate.

“Get the fuck off me, shittykawa, you’re the worst.” Iwaizumi growled.

He turned to where Kuroo still had his arm protectively around you and bowed stiffly.

“My sincerest apologies for this asshole’s actions,” he said as he kept himself in a low bow, “I tried to stop him a few times but he wouldn’t listen, I had been trying to find Trashikawa and her – he gestured to you – all day today, but only just found them both now.”

“No harm done.” Kuroo replied in an authoritative tone, “I’ll take it from here.”

“Much appreciated.” Iwaizumi said as he straightened and glared at Oikawa. “Bow and apologize, you piece of shit.”

“No.” Oikawa pouted, crossing his arms across his chest and pointing his chin in the air.

Iwaizumi turned and punched him hard in the stomach, making the latter double over instantly.

“Apologize.” Iwaizumi growled as he grabbed onto his captain’s head and held him in a headlock.

“Sorry.” Oikawa mumbled.

You hung your head.

“Forgiven,” Kuroo said stiffly before turning you away from the two Aobajohsai players. “We’ll take our leave now.”

Kuroo kept his arm around you as you both walked off and you could still hear Iwaizumi and Oikawa behind you.

“What the fuck, man?” Iwaizumi snapped.

“Iwa-chan, he punched my beautiful face.” Oikawa whined.

“There’s nothing fucking beautiful about you, you’re a pile of flaming horse shit.” Iwaizumi growled angrily.

“Awww Iwa-chan, don’t be like that.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“My head hurts.”

“I’ll make it hurt even more if you don’t shut up.”

“Hey.” Kuroo said softly, his voice interrupting the disappearing banter of the other two, “you ok?”

Tears suddenly spilled down your face, a small whimper escaping your lips as you kept your head down.

Kuroo could hear you crying so didn’t ask any more questions but just walked with his arm around you, down to a cafe nearby and entered quickly, ushering you to a booth at the back of the place so no one would see you crying.

“I feel so humiliated.” You sobbed as you slid into the booth seat, hiding your eyes from his view.

“Here.” He said, passing you a tissue.

You took it and wiped your eyes before blowing your nose softly.

“He’s the one who feels more humiliated right now, he just got punched in the head by two people.” Kuroo stated.

“He deserves that but I also deserve to be chewed out because of how stupid I was.” You said glumly. 

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