“Ok let me get it all ready for you then.” She said, “I’ll help you shower and dry then we can sort food out.”
“Thank you.” You meowed politely then you paused. “Woah!! No wait a second I don’t want you to dry me that means you’ll see me na-.” You looked down. “Oh, cat form.” You laughed internally. “All good, you can dry me.”
You had been meowing your one sided dialogue this whole time and your friend had just sat there with a very bored expression on her face, waiting for you to stop.
“Ok, you done with your little chat there?” She asked with a sigh as she got up and walked out of her room and across the hall to the bathroom.
“Yep, we all good, me, myself and I all agree.” You meowed with an internal chuckle as you jumped down off the bed to follow her.
She turned the shower on and got it to a nice temperature then stepped back for you to pass her and hop in.
“Ok, there you go smelly cat, in you get.” She said as she shook the water off her hand and wiped it dry on her pants.
You hesitantly put one little toe bean into the shower and immediately retracted it.
“I don’t know why but I don’t like this?” You meowed, looking up at her.
“What’s wrong?” She asked, “too hot?”
She reached in and adjusted the temperature.
You shook your head. “No I just don’t want to go in all of a sudden.” You meowed again.
“Hurry up you’re wasting water!” She chided briskly, trying to give you a little push on the backside with her foot, booping your rump a few times for encouragement.
“Oi! Don’t do that you asshole! I just said I didn’t want to go in.” You hissed, turning and biting her leg lightly.
She screeched in surprise and shock and jumped back.
“DON’T FUCKING BITE ME Y/N!” She yelled, “GET IN THE SHOWER!”
“I’m sorry ok? But you needed it.” Your friend said 15 minutes later, covered in bites and scratches, as she rubbed you dry with a soft towel.
“I fucking told you I didn’t want to go in the shower so you bloody deserved all those bites and scratches you bitch.” You growled lowly at her, the pitch of your growl being interrupted by her rubbing your face and neck vigorously.
“Ok, done.” She said, smoothing your fur down with her hands. “I was thinking some kind of soup for dinner? Might be easier for you to eat.”
“Whatever it is it had BETTER make up for the fact that you basically tried to drown me in the shower.” You growled lowly again.
“Ok, ok I get that you’re pissed at me.” She said in a vexed tone, “but can we PLEASE just move on and focus on dinner?”
You glared at her and she arched up at you.
“Ok, you know what if you’re gonna be like that I’m gonna pull the ‘human’ card. You’re a cat and you’ll eat what I give you.” She said with annoyance as she stood up, marching out of the room and down to the kitchen.
“Umm, no honey, I’M the cat here, so I get to say what we’re going to eat, I call the shots. Don’t you know those are the rules.” You meowed as you raced after her down the hall, tail kinked as you bounced along.
She walked into the kitchen and started pulling things out of the cupboard to cook with, placing them on the kitchen bench as she went.
“Wait, where are your parents? Aren’t they home tonight?” You meowed at her.
“Listen, whatever it is, the answer is either: yes, no or I’ll do it later.” Your friend mumbled as she crouched down to reach into the back of the lowest cupboard to get some more things out. “You need to remember I can’t understand you, all I hear is incessant meowing.”
You looked up onto the bench and; with a little bum wiggle, sprung up and clambered onto it to see what she had pulled out to cook with.
“All these ingredients look fine…” You thought as you tiptoed among the jars and tins, sniffing different things here and there. “Hold on, wait… what’s this?” You thought as you sniffed at one jar in particular. “Yuck! The fuck is this??”
You scrunched your nose up and reeled back on your haunches, one paw raised up as you batted the lid of the jar.
“Hey! Hey what are you doing?” F/N asked as she stood up with the last of the ingredients in hand.
She walked over and tried to push your paw away from the jar.
“Don’t hit it.” She demanded sharply.
“But I don’t like the smell of this one.” You meowed with a whine.
She turned her back on you to get one last thing and you reached out for the jar again, pushing it across the bench with your paw. You stopped pushing it as it got closer to the edge of the bench and just held it there.
Your friend turned around as you looked up at her, your paw just touching the jar.
“Y/N.” She said sharply. “Don’t push it any further or it will fall off.”
“Oh? Will it?” You meowed lowly and sarcastically, a devious glint taking form in your intelligent blue cat eyes. “Then I won’t have to eat it if it smashes, right?”
“Y/N, I’m warning you.” She said again when it didn’t look like you were going to back down.
There was an intense stand off between the two of you as you just held eye contact.
Deliberately slowly you pushed the jar the last of the way along the bench and it tipped off the edge and fell to its end, smashing and sending the contents EVERYWHERE.
“Y/N!” Your friend screeched. “YOU DID NOT JUST DO THAT!”
“Yep. Just did.” You thought smuggly, giving her the biggest ‘eat shit’ grin you could muster.
“YOU’RE DEAD NOW BITCH!” She screamed as she lunged at you, watching where she stepped as she launched across the kitchen floor to grab you.
“Oop! Cat out… Laters losers!” You meow squeaked as you turned and leapt off the counter.
She chased you for a bit before groaning in annoyance and turning back to the kitchen to clean up the mess.
“It’s going to reek of garlic in this house now.” She moaned. “Why did you have to push the crushed garlic jar off the bench!?”
“Because it stank, that’s why.” You meowed as you poked your head around the corner of the wall to look at her.
She turned and glared at you.
After making a makeshift meal for the two of you, you meowed your goodbyes and trotted to the front door to be let out.
“Are you staying at your house tonight?” She asked curiously.
You shook your head.
“Wait? You’re not? Then who’s place are you staying at??” She asked.
“Shinsou’s!” You meowed proudly.
“Y/N.” She deadpanned. “I don’t know what that means.” Then it clicked. “Wait… Shinsou’s?” She asked.
You nodded vigorously.
“YOU’RE STAYING AT HIS PLACE?!” She gasped. “Man talk about special privileges as a cat!”
“I know right?” You replied smuggly. “Anyway I’d better get going my OWNER needs me.”
“Good luck out there.” She said as she opened the door and you scooted out.
“Thanks!” You called back over your shoulder as you took off down the street back to Shinsou’s apartment.